One billion lions vs. one of every Pokémon
A breakdown on who would win
If you’re online at all then you’ve probably heard about the argument of one billion lions vs one of every Pokémon and I’m here to tell you why Pokémon win this 10/10 times. I believe there are multiple ways to look at this from the Pokémon’s perspective:
Pokedex
Magcargo
If we look at some Pokédex entries then there are multiple Pokémon that could theoretically solo all of them. For example, Magcargo has the following Pokédex entry in Generation 5:
Its body temperature is roughly 18,000 degrees F. Flames spout from gaps in its hardened shell.
The sun is about 10,000 degrees F on it’s surface. Now, the question of if the sun could beat a billion lions is a whole different can of worms but I think that Macgargo alone could make a sizable dent.
Alakazam
Let’s now look at Alakazam, his Pokédex entries say that he is insanely intelligent:
Its brain can outperform a supercomputer. Its IQ (intelligence quotient) is said to be around 5,000.
The highest IQ ever recorded is about 250 to 300 which would mean that Alakazam is about 20 times smarter than the smartest human ever. And as the Pokédex entry says: he can outperform a supercomputer. And of course, it has amazing psychic abilities. There’s no way any lions could beat this.
Metang
This is a Pokémon that is not even a fully evolved form, so it’s safe to assume that this is true for Metagross as well. Metang can tank a jet:
It is formed by two Beldum joining together. Its steel body won’t be scratched if it collides with a jet.
Last time I checked a lion can not even nearly generate the same amount of force as a jet going full-speed. There’s basically no way that Metang could be damaged by the lions, he could just sit there and very slowly kill all the lions.
Yveltal
Yveltal is also a sort of wincon:
When its life comes to an end, it absorbs the life energy of every living thing and turns into a cocoon once more.
Basically after dying it will kill everyone, this will be more like a draw, except that Yveltal is not dead, just a cocoon.
Gardevoir
This one is a true draw, Gardevoir can create A BLACK HOLE:
To protect its Trainer, it will expend all its psychic power to create a small black hole.
Creating a black hole will just kill everyone and everything. All the lions would die, as well as most of the Pokémon.
Others
There are many other examples of this, some like Arceus and of course Palkia, Dialga and Giratina. Or, you know any other legendary and most mythical Pokémon. There is no way that, if you take the versions of the Pokémon from the Pokédex that they would lose to the lions.
Games
One on one
For the games it is a bit more complex but also a lot less. There’s a great video by Astroid Videos in which he simulates a theoretical battle:
If we look at it from this perspective where we have a line of Pokémon versus a line of lions. Where it is a 1v1 until one of them dies and then we swap in a new lion/Pokémon. The video’s conclusion is with Harvest Pokémon and them being almost unkillable. He says that it could be possible with a lot of resources and luck (because his lions had a move that could flinch). I think there are a few problems though.
It makes no sense that the lions have a Dark type move, how would a regular lion have access to “magical” Dark energy? I think they would only have Normal type moves, maybe some Fighting moves. Therefore Ghost types are entirely immune to lions which would make sense. Therefore there are probably way more ways to keep infinitely going because all Ghost types don’t have to worry about health at all, just their PP.
If there is just a conga line of each of them on both sides then the Pokémon could spare a few to setup Spikes, Stealth Rock and Sticky Web among others. That plus Ghost types are immune plus there were already some very promising Pokémon makes for a battle which, in my opinion they can’t lose.
Team Battle
If, instead of going one vs one one after the other, it was instead a Team Battle, every Pokémon lined up versus every lion lined up. I think in this case it is an even worse because the Pokémon could just throw up Mat Block once from Greninja and once from Throh, with those two turns of safety they could setup anything that damages all opponents: Hail or Sandstorm. It would then simply be a case of stalling. Most of the non-Ghost type Pokémon would die because getting attacked by a million lions each. But, as I’ve expressed above, I believe that none of the Ghost types should be able to be hit by any of the lions. Just have one of the Ghost types have Rest or Recover and use those a few times, there’s no way the lions survive for long.
One other way to go would be to Perish Song which will make anyone on the field faint in three turns. Now this is a problem because it affects everyone even our own. To combat this we want a Pokémon with Soundproof, they are unaffected by sound-based attacks like Perish Song. The speed of the lion in Astroid’s video is 72, which means that Mr. Mime outspeeds them and he has both the ability Soundproof and the move Skill Swap. With both of these we give a Ghost type Pokémon the Soundproof ability, then use Perish Song and there’s absolutely nothing the lions can do.
There are probably many other creative ways you can think of that the Pokémon could beat the lions but, unless the Pokémon have no prepation, the lions should lose.
Anime
Arceus, just Arceus. God versus one billion lions? How would they beat that? In the official trailer of Pokémon: Giratina and the Sky Warrior Giratina brings Dialga to the Reverse World against Dialga’s will.
The Reverse World is very dangerous and Giratina could transport most of the Pokémon to it at first, then regroup and figure out some strategy. They could then for example have Giratina bring a few thousand lions at a time and then kill them in groups. Yes, this will take a long time but I don’t see any way in which it won’t take a long time.
There are also just flying Pokémon. Even if you make some sort of argument of a lion ladder or mountain or staircase or whatever, none of those structures are sound enough to be moved when a Flying type moves away from where they are trying to reach them. This depends more on the type of arena but there are flying Pokémon, like Gengar, that don’t have to use energy to stay afloat.
Apart from this there are just way too many things that the Anime shows to even begin (to be honest I haven’t watched much of it apart from the occasional Pokémon movie or tv show). And I haven’t even mentioned that the lions probably still couldn’t hit the Ghost types! Although there are a few instances of a Normal type move hitting a Dragon type, although those are probably just errors I would still consider it a risk to just count on Ghost types for this fight.
Tyrantrum using Hyperbeam (a Normal move) on Dragapult (a Ghost type)
Conclusion
No matter what medium you want to scale the Pokémon to, there are just a few that are too powerful to stop. Surprisingly though, not every Pokémon carries in the same medium. Some carry in the Pokédex entries, others carry in-game one on one and others carry in-game in a ginormous Team Battle. Even others still carry in the Anime. But I think I’ve pretty definitively shown that Pokémon would beat lions any day of the week.